In brief...

I'm a Nature-lover, aspiring conservationist, and wannabe traveller in search of outdoor adventure.
My interests vary from conservation to education to heritage to Nature (biodiversity & wildlife) to outdoor activities to life in general.
They occupy most of my waking moment.
Do read my blogs, follow me on Twitter (@jocelynesze) and friend me on Facebook (subject to my discretion). Visit my Nature blog, Nature Rambles, at http://natureramble.wordpress.com.

UPDATE 2 Apr 2017 - This site is no longer maintained, please visit jocelynesze.wordpress.com if you're interested in more recent writing.

Monday, June 30, 2008

okay it's photo time!(:

i think i look dao-er than anyone else :P
haha kay it was fun(: i have lousy aiming anyway
psb chalet 08! haha although only 6 of us slept over :( from left to right, me, eunice, xin ping, anthea, lin wen :D and the body on the bed is adelle xD she refuses to take photos >:(

our wonderful sleeping arrangement. haha(:

113'08! miss psl sessions :( see them around, but only some wave to me.. haha ah wells, should be glad that some still wave huh(:

pretty pretty rainbow i saw one day during the hols!(:

pretty sky! during holiday trip to Cherating, Malaysia.



visited this island off the shore, had to do some pretty neat climbing to get to the fishing site. the island appeared to be built out of dead corals D:

their first catch of the day. i dont fish.

super long jellyfishes. and huge mushroom-like ones too. no wonder no one swims there, though the water is very, very, very clear

younger bro buried chest-deep xD

starfish. many of them found on the beach.

flower crab! it's quite big, about size of my palm. i can predict it's future you know.

this is what it'll become when it grows up. i promise you i didnt eat it. only my brothers and my parents.

look! mini durians(:

sunrise!(:

jelly fish washed up on shore turned blue.
pretty sky! again. and the tide is super duper low!!! i find myself admiring shapes in clouds more often nowadays...
my mom and i. ignore my bro in the background please xD

my mom and dad <3 onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_-vLu3zKUh8k/SGkEqm7b-RI/AAAAAAAAAOY/dw9Jtlo_JJw/s1600-h/IMGP4944.JPG">haha that's better. only my mom a bit too short only xD shh!

my totally adorable but completely bratty cousin(:




ahh okay, posting photos take a looooong time :( this shall be my last before eya. kay must impose restrictions on myself >:( cant wait for eyas to be over




maybe i just shouldnt care. that'd be easier, wont it?





still trying to convince myself. study study study.






why is it that even when you know you're doing the right thing, it's just so damn hard to believe in it?

Sunday, June 29, 2008

the next generation of kids are getting smarter. and brattier. toddlers taking a third/or multiple language?!? and here i quit french after half a year of studying. D: and kids nowadays are really spoilt, they expect others to do everything for them. but then again, i'm making this statement based on my tuition teacher's daughter, so maybe i'm committing a fallacy. of hasty generalisation.


finished by geog pt. again. too lazy to make minor edits.. would probably cost my grades, but then again, i never expect to do well for PTs.



july is coming. in two days. think short term; handover. think long term; no more exams!





you'd think that with films like Finding Nemo, environmental protection awareness might be increased. that it might occur to people that we should try to protect whatever that has been entrusted to us. but no, after watching films like that, all the more people try to get clownfish to put in their home aquarium. annoying >:( and now clownfish are endangered. read wildfilms to find out more.


our world is ridiculous. the people who live on this earth is ridiculous. you have Americans using up more oil than the next five countries on the list of countries which use the most oil. even though oil is scarce and limited and expensive.






i hate reading fiction. they put me in a not down-to-earth state. reading is only for people with a lot of time on their hands and no deadlines.

Saturday, June 28, 2008

just read the blog of a guy in my cat class, you can go read it for more details if you want. but really, there are people who would miss catechism class (religious classes, held every sunday. you dont actually learn anything of importance till your last year. at least for me)?!? i had no idea there were people who actually liked them..

maybe the opportunity it gives for socialising, and anyhows i think the guys gel better together than the girls. cos im certainly not missing it. in fact if you want the truth, cat classes were the worst part of going to church. i didnt learn anything productive from classes, i could have learnt them all on my on just reading the bible, or searching the web. we didnt have productive debating sessions about science and religion which i would be very interested in, but the rest of the class hated cos it would just delay the class ending time. and anyhows, i've a feeling they just went to socialise.



can you see the difference? did i make it up, made me see what i wanted to see, did what i thought i was expected to do? or was it planned to be this way?
cos i havent done these in the longest time ever..

Personality Quiz
Intellectual You're really smart, obviously, but you're more book smart than street smart. You like reading, watch the news, and love discussing whatever is going on in the world. You enjoy being around people who challenge you intellectually.


haha i'm intellectual. ahh whatever, street or book, i dont even get to read that much. cos once i do, i get hooked, and yeah i cant do my work.


Your Personality Profile
You are funky, outdoorsy, and down to earth.
While you may not be a total hippie...
You're definitely one of the most free spirited people around.

You are very impulsive - every day is a new adventure.
However, you do put some thought behind all your actions.
Still, you do tend to shock and offend people from time to time!


You Are 16% Spoiled

You are definitely not spoiled. You've worked hard for what you have.
Down to earth and grounded, you don't need a lot to make you happy.

ha, i'm not spoiled. knew i was never spoiled anyway :P



Your Element Is Air

You dislike conflict, and you've been able to rise above the angst of the world.
And when things don't go your way, you know they'll blow over quickly.

Easygoing, you tend to find joy from the simple things in life.
You roll with the punches, and as a result, your life is light and cheerful.

You find it easy to adapt to most situations, and you're an open person.
With you, what you see is what you get... and people love that!

but do we get the results that we want to get, or is it who we truly are?



the best!
  1. How would you describe your sense of humor?
    • A little gross
    • Borderline offensive
    • Pretty offensive and occasionally dark
    • So twisted that it crosses all lines
    • Goofy
Your Life is Rated PG

Your life is pretty family friendly. The worse someone is going to get from you is brief nudity or toilet humor.

okay, toilet humour. first lame jokes, now toilet humour?!?! :(




  1. What bumper sticker are you most likely to have on your car?
    • Errors have been made, others will be blamed.
    • Ohhh, let me turn on the part of my brain that gives a damn.
    • Mean People Suck
haha xD
You're Totally Sarcastic
You sarcastic? Never! You're as sweet as a baby bunny.
Seriously, though, you have a sharp tongue - and you aren't afraid to use it.
And if people are too wimpy to deal with your attitutde, then too bad. So sad.




  1. You find yourself telling jokes that no one else gets.
    • Often
    • Always
    • Sometimes
    • Never
    • Rarely
Your Quirk Factor: 47%

You're a pretty quirky person, but you're just normal enough to hide it.
Congratulations - you've fooled other people into thinking you're just like them!





Your Personality Cluster is Extraverted Thinking

You are:

Organized and logical - a master at puzzles
Competitive in almost any arena of life
Objective when necessary, but passionate about what you truly love
Intolerant of excuses and incompetence


haha yeah right, a master at puzzles... did i mention that i cant do sudoku or rubic's cube?





You Are a Realist

You don't see the glass as half empty or half full. You see what's exactly in the glass.
You never try to make a bad situation seem better than it is...
But you also never sabotage any good things you have going on.
You are brutally honest in your assessments of situations - and this always seems to help you cope.


yepp, i'm a realist. a practical realist. but that doesnt mean i dont have dreams..




Your Dominant Intelligence is Linguistic Intelligence

You are excellent with words and language. You explain yourself well.
An elegant speaker, you can converse well with anyone on the fly.
You are also good at remembering information and convincing someone of your point of view.
A master of creative phrasing and unique words, you enjoy expanding your vocabulary.

You would make a fantastic poet, journalist, writer, teacher, lawyer, politician, or translator.

yeah yeah, whatever you say. i still want to study marine biology or sth to do with biology!


You Are A Good Friend

You're always willing to listen
Or lend a shoulder to cry on
You're there through thick and thin
Many people consider you their "best friend"!



ehh really? somehow i dont think so...




What Your Fridge Says About You

You like to be surrounded by things you love. You aren't exactly greedy, but you can be materialistic at times.

You tend to be a fairly thrifty person. You splurge occasionally, but you're mostly a saver.

You don't tend to be a very adventurous person, but you do surprise everyone now and then. You have a bit of a wild side.

You try to be responsible, but you don't always succeed. Your heart is in the right place though.

You are likely to be married - and very busy.




uh huhh.. haha okay whatever, this is enough for a day.
apcg meeting today morning was a total waste of time. went to ri at 8am, and stayed till about 1030, 11. when actually what we went there to do could be done over email. when we were told to stay till 1pm. how ridiculous. anyways, crashed juan's house after to play mahjong while waiting for my dad.


confirmation just now was a... very fast experience. you're just there for less than a minute, and that's it, you're an adult catholic. well the entire mass service was an hour and a half but still. wasnt very fun.



i need to re do geog pt from scratch, thanks to my very nice teacher, and i need to get a start on ss pt.




i hope everything goes fine.

Friday, June 27, 2008

today's an exhausting day. geog lesson was a waste of time, in fact, geog IS a waste of time. imagine your teacher asking you, "jocelyne, are you going to cambodia to film?" just cos your geog pt mode was a video. i swear, she's just out to get me. i think she secretly hates watching videos, so she just made that up (about having to interview real child labourers and their parents) so that we wont do that. argh. and now i have to start from SCRATCH. i am so going to fail my PTs. I HATE PTS.



class phototaking was funny(: haha i think i'll really miss 407 next year :( anyway, after that i left school to go Singapore School for the Deaf, to interact with the kids there (i call them kids, but really, some of them were 17 years old) so that we could familiarise ourselves with them before the taiwanese came over next week. it's a really interesting experience, like really. (: i'm thankful for the opportunities i get being in rg.

anyway, it was already 130pm and i was still at mountbatten rd, and i had to be back in school by 150 to catch the bus that would bring us to teachers network. so i was really panicking cos somehow all the taxis refused to go past that stretch of road.

got back in time, but the briefing there, i felt, was really not worth me rushing back for. it was really really uh. nvm. just made me re-think a lot of stuff. it was @#$%!*&+$!@$#%!



yeah then after that went for talent vogue. haha it was really cool lah, honestly. haha good job to the talent team (who ARE talented, whatever they say) and yeah, i enjoyed it. i only wish the profits could go to osl >:(



yeah so that somewhat summarises my day. ah i'll fail summary. anyway, on the way back home, dad decided to buy durians. the 3 for $10 kind, which wasnt very nice. the durian guy packed it in two styrofoam boxes. and my dad and i finished one box on the way home xD hahaha.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Just So You Know - Jesse McCartney

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

[Chorus:]
Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around, I can't let him win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all
Before I go
Just so you know

It's getting hard to be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

[Chorus]

This emptiness is killing me
And I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back I realize
It was always there just never spoken
I'm waiting here...been waiting here

[Chorus]



just take out the part about loving you when i shouldnt and the part about guys, and it'll be what i feel. just so you know. not that it might matter at all.
i dont like it. and i cant stand it. the way the whole world around me is turning into i dno, someone else.

tell me what is anorexia. eating little (or healthy foods) and exercising a lot. more or less? and that's exactly what you guys are doing. i dont care if you say it's for health sake, cos this is extremism. it upsets me, and frankly i dont approve of it. but i cant do anything about it, cos it's your mouth after all, and it's your right or watever. and it makes me feel sick to know that i'm helpless to do anything about it.

and honestly, i'm afraid that qian yi mo hua, it'll rub off me too. and not that it's bad, but really, i dont want to become like that. moderation is fine with me.


or maybe i'm just finding excuses, cos i cant seem to find the time that i want to exercise. and i choose not to sleep away my break times instead of eating. it's totally escapism, and it's bad.







anyway, only going for geog and pe tmr. and having class photo taking during pe, so effectively, only geog. tmr's gonna be a busy day anyways. visit to SSD, apcg meeting with GEB, talent vogue concert.







you guys are freaking me out. seriously. is it because of that that i dont hang around you all so much, or is it because i dont hang around you all so much that i feel like that?

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

fell asleep in chinese today > : ( ah wells. at least it wasnt in physics. i sorta get it now..



i realise i'm really gonna miss rg when we leave. i rmb in sec one, i hated rg. like seriously, i mean which school asks their students to dress up as cultural FOOD for rhd??!? i still find it ridiculous now, but yeah, gotten used to the system, and even though it's not perfect, it's made me who i am. for the most part. and what mrs deborah tan said during those talks you have during sec one orientation really is true, even though i was very skeptical of it then. the friends that you make in sec sch are prob the ones you'll talk to most. cos sec sch's the time when you grow the most. not just physically, but also mentally. though of course, i havent been to jc so i cant say much.




july's gonna fly past. august is gonna follow, with a sigh of relief. september will pass, with only 2 months left. october will disappear, taking with it my last few activities in rgs with rgs as an rgs girl. then november will go, ending with odac. and december will be last, with a tinge of rgs still, with osl, but rjc beckons, and do i want to go?

Monday, June 23, 2008

went for lsl in the afternoon, the little kids there are super cute!(: but ultra naughty, one boy scratched me > : ( ah wells. i enjoyed myself(:

horrible morning, ss and trip sci. thankfully geog teacher and math teacher wasnt around, tho we had relief teacher for math.



house feels very empty, mom went to london for work and jon went for camp... and my dad went to pick my ah ma from the airport and isnt home yet.




feeling very tired, like physically. it's just the first week, 9 more weeks to go. coming weeks packed with events, i think term 3 is the crux. like if you can get pass this, then you'll be fine. else you're just gonna fall here. and i certainly hope i dont. i promise i will study hard! i'm getting the hang of physics already(:


oh and my class is done with class video already(: it's really cool, and i'm very proud of shaina and the people who helped her!




control. control your thoughts, your feelings, your actions, your words.






btw, i've finally got a move on uploading my holiday pictures. i've got really pretty sky pictures!

Saturday, June 21, 2008

Perfect - Simple Plan

Hey Dad look at me
Think back and talk to me
Did I grow up according
To plan?
Do you think I’m wasting
My time doing things I
Wanna do?
But it hurts when you
Disapprove all along

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I’m never gonna be good
Enough for you
I can’t pretend that
I’m alright
And you can’t change me

‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect

I try not to think
About the pain I feel inside
Did you know you used to be my hero?
All the days
You spent with me
Now seem so far away
And it feels like you don’t care anymore

And now I try hard to make it
I just want to make you proud
I’m never gonna be good
Enough for you
I can’t stand another fight
And nothing’s alright

‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect

Nothing’s gonna change
The things that you said
Nothing’s gonna make this
Right again
Please don’t turn your back
I can’t believe it’s hard
Just to talk to you
But you don’t understand

‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect

‘Cuz we lost it all
Nothing lasts forever
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect
Now it’s just too late
And we can’t go back
I’m sorry
I can’t be Perfect







i hate it when people take that tone with you when you have done no wrong, then turn around and pretend nothing's happened. if i did that to someone, i would apologise. but clearly, some people dont practice that.


i'm not a good christian, i know that, cos christians are supposed to forgive. but it's just one time too many. and i cant stand it. and i wont.








cycled from changi to ecp and back to changi. climbed in the afternoon. went for chi tuition. then did a little bit of jogging.

my promises for term 3:
- i will sleep at 1130. SLEEP, not switch off the comp.
- i will go climbing only once a fortnight for july, and not go at all in august.
- i will at least LOOK at one subject every night. physics, chemistry, biology, geography, math.
- i will not sleep in class. i will listen and ask questions, and make sure i understand everything.
- i will not go out at all in august.
- i will make sure i get a decent enough gpa.





i will, because i can, because i want. and there are sacrifices that need to be made.







ambivalent.

Friday, June 20, 2008

second day back at school, and i swear, going back to school these two days have been nothing but a little waste of time. i didnt learn anything, seriously.

springfield was yesterday, and it was quite fun. really nervous, cos the route looked super tough, but it was okay. fell at the overhang, i was super tired, limbs were all shaking. anyhow, it's prob the last competition i'm gonna take part in this year. dont think i'll go for rockamania..

rushed back for sign language course, and it's really really fun and interesting. i've always wanted to learn sign language, only being me, i was too lazy to do so. and now dwen an has given me the opportunity to. cool huh(: i can sign lang quite basic stuff now. haha better than my french anyway.

osl phototaking was amusing, with our sunglasses.

today, rushed for psb, sln phototaking and hadley. after school went climbing with the other three, cos mr tan happened to be free. lead climbed and attempted overhang. haha very similar to my spring field.

went for the last day of the sign language course. quite sad that it's over, cos it was really fun, and mrs chew kept us all supplied with lots of food. really hope i dont forget what i've learnt though...




i need to get back in the mood for studying. study study study. that's the theme for this term. D:






one month.

Wednesday, June 18, 2008

cabbed to school bright and early in the morning to get climbing equipment. cab fare was a mind-blowing $17.80. just from tanah merah! i swear the uncle purposely drove slowly so he would be stuck at all the traffic light junctions.

anyway U14 let's rock was quite okay, the route. only 1 girl flashed (2 guys) and 11 reached the second last piece. from our school side, it was well, as usual lah. quite normal.

then the 12 of us went into isolation for U17, and waited there for like 2 hours. cos it was raining, and so we played cards. then in the end they decided to postpone the competition to tomorrow. and so we get to miss a bit of school tmr. so i spent my last day of holidays stuck in springfield secondary. so exciting...



we're running out of holidays... there's never enough, but somehow the end of this holidays seem especially significant to me. maybe cos tomorrow's gonna be the start of my last semester in secondary school, in rgs. or the start of my last term in whatever postitions i am in. or the start of an extremely intimidating term, with taiwan exchange, apcg, overnight cycling and to top it off, end of year exams.






dont want to study.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

church chalet was quite fun... basically just played cards. had a bbq. only other person who actually slept, cos the rest just gambled the whole night. hmm dont think we got any closer, not that the chalet was actually supposed to be some bonding thing. ah well, just one more week. that's prob the last time you'll see all of us together. then sayonara.


i hate post dated blogging, but sometimes (like on sun) i was just too lazy. and i've got a bad memory too, so yeah.


osl working camp, i had fun, and i think it was rather productive. very heartwarming to see all the sec threes coming together to think about osl and what it really means to them. they're a nice bunch, but i do think the mentors are a greater bunch xD btw, having juniors may not necessarily always be a good thing. especially when they say to you, straight in the face, "you suck." well obv you know they're joking, but still.

mentors were great fun, had prata for supper and all. and we do pretty cool jump shots. i'm looking forward to osl this year, especially to cambodia. but i dont want it to be over so soon. cos it signifies a new beginning, and the end of this chapter of my life.




let's rock tomorrow. soff and i ran one round around the track this morning to wake us up (or me) and we didnt stretch or anything so now my calf muscles are very tight :/ and best of all, i forgot to get out climbing equipment for tmr.


last day of holidays. need to do math.





how do people do it.

Friday, June 13, 2008

When We Die - Bowling For Soup

Well, I know that it's early and it's too hard to think
And the broken empty bottles are a reminder in the sink
But I thought that I should tell you, if it's not to late to say
I could put back all the pieces, they just might not fit the same

Cause nothing's worth losing especially the chance to make it right

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

Well, I know it's been years now, and I don't look the same
And the hopes and dreams you had for me you thought went down the drain.
And the room feels so empty where my pictures used to be
And I can't say that I blame you, but you can't blame me

Cause nothing's worth losing especially the chance to make it right

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

Come over
Come over

Cause I gotta know, if I am doing this all on my own

Come over
Come over

How can I show you if you're not here

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

And I know that we're gonna be fine
And the tattooed mistakes are gonna fade over time
As long as we live, time passes by
And we won't get it back when we die

Come over
Come over

Wooohooohooohaaaaawwww

Come over
Come over

Wooohooohooohaaaaawwww

Come over
Come over

(I gotta know)
(And we wont get it back when we die)

And I know that it's early





the only thing that sticks in my head: and i know that we're going to be fine.







are we really? are we going to make it fine, or leave it to someone else to make it so?
psb chalet yesterday. haha and i seriously had hestitations about whether i wanted to go, cos nair made me go from tanah merah to dhoby ghaut to have lunch with her, then i had to go all the way back to pasir ris. but anyway, in the end i reasoned out that i didnt go last year, and if i dont go this year, what would i be doing anyway (studying? :( aw man i didnt study at all!) and i'm really really glad i went :D

even though there was only a sad SIX of us staying over, and the most number of people who turned up (that day) was 10, i still have lots of fun and yep i enjoyed it(: took neoprints on impulse, will show another day (if that day ever comes. i've still got my msia pictures and dno what else)




i havent studied. havent touched physics, chem and everything else since like.. mya? howww, later school start cannot understand anything.



everything's coming in. osl fundraising, taiwan (omgoodness, only like two weeks more!), apcg (one more month?!) and EYAs! argh.





not july.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

really worried for july.

geog pt, ss pt, chem pt due.
taiwan exchange.
overnight cycling.
apcg.
usual amount of hw, probably even more.
HAVE to revise, else i'll fail my eyas.
handover.

by week 5, everything will be over, and the focus is on eya. except handover i think.

everyone's going to have a holiday in week 4. i calculated, only 1.5% of the rgs population will not get their one week holiday. sigh, and i think i really need that week to study, catch up, revise. cos for all that i said i'm going to study this hols, i didnt. :/ ever the procrastinator :(





not looking forward.
Teardrops on My Guitar - Taylor Swift

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see
That I want and I'm needing everything that we should be
I'll bet she's beautiful, that girl he talks about
And she's got everything that I have to live without

Drew talks to me, I laugh cause it's so damn funny
That I can't even see anyone when he's with me
He says he's so in love, he's finally got it right,
I wonder if he knows he's all I think about at night

[Chorus:]

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do

Drew walks by me, can he tell that I can't breathe?
And there he goes, so perfectly,
The kind of flawless I wish I could be
She'd better hold him tight, give him all her love
Look in those beautiful eyes and know she's lucky cause

[Repeat Chorus]

So I drive home alone, as I turn out the light
I'll put his picture down and maybe
Get some sleep tonight

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
He's the song in the car I keep singing, don't know why I do
He's the time taken up, but there's never enough
And he's all that I need to fall into..

Drew looks at me, I fake a smile so he won't see.


like the song, even though the lyrics make no sense.




somewhat finished a draft of geog pt. decided to leave ss pt till term starts. and osl 07 video (a funny version) till eyas end. yeah a great procrastinator i am. sigh :/ no time to do all that i want :(


and dont think i'm going to recount my holiday, going to take too much effort. just that it was really fun, at the beach. dad had some back problems so stayed in hotel to rest. rest of us rented a boat, brought us to this island to do fishing. i hate recreational fishing, but well. had some pretty cool rock climbing there too. water was very clear, but the whole island seemed to be made out of dead corals. lots of jelly fish there. like seriously. anyway, there was nice food and nice beach and i had a nice holiday. came back with lots of bites though, dont seem like mozzie bites, they dont go away! sigh :( and visited my msia relatives too. grand uncle and grand aunt. they're really nice people. grand uncle was state minister for tourism or sth, knows a lot of cool places for white water rafting, paint balling and haha the largest indoor rockclimbing centre xD shall go there one day(:


psb chalet next, wont be online. and sat to sun is church chalet. and mon to tues is working camp.








for one more month.
Tomorrow is World Day Against Child Labour, did you know? probably not, but neither would i know if i'm not doing my geog pt. which is on Child Labour.



went to cut my hair in the morning. haha after talking about it for months, i finally went to cut it short xD



dont think i can finish ss pt by hols :/

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

somehow things just converge;

juan! 16 ♥ says:
................................siling .................

+ ; 16 jellyfish 不用怕, 相信我。 says:
...............juan ............................................



hahaha i was seriously amused. separate convo, different topics (at the start) like totally different. but somehow, it just goes back to a point.




what if. what if i never went to raffles.
back from msia. had a great time there, thank the Lord we made it there and back safe and sound(: shall post pics another day.



overwhelmed by emotions right now. surfing blogs does that to me i guess. dont know why i still surf blogs, cos i dont always feel happy after that.


sometimes, reading blogs remind me of so much more that i have that others dont. and i count my blessings, i really do. i try not to whine too much about things that matter.

but other blogs. other blogs just make me feel like shite. that there's much more that i'm missing out on. although the feeling that i spent that time doing something more worthwhile quells out the other. or tries to anyway.


think i need some sleep. couldnt sleep well in msia at all. interrupted sleep and all.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

my last free day of the holidays.
woke up at 7.40am for a 8am meeting at RI. so early and so far :( i swear, i've been to RI so many times this year, it's like preparing me for next year. though of cos, there may be other people who go there often too.
and the rest of the girls (weishan, shimin, lifang) pangsei-ed me :( the taiwan programme thing is seriously a lot of commitment though. but haha it's gonna be fun(: yay cant wait.

then went climbing with juan. cos wei pangsei-ed us again. my best climb? on my first wall. a 6A route, yellow one. just as i was moving over to step on another piece, i very smartly whacked my knee against the metal bolt. IT HURT LIKE CRAP LAH. and now it's swollen and blue-black and bruised and there's a cut too. :( and juan offers NO SYMPATHY at all.

anyway lunch was at this little cafe downstairs. quite nice food there, never knew it existed. after that jon came along, and yeah climbed. tried to do lead inside. only two 6A lead routes, one green, one yellow. juan did the green. after third runner, gave up. it was tough like crap, seriously! and i tried the yellow. managed lah, but wah, super scary. very scared of falling :/


came home and fell asleep again. this is a bad habit of mine, and i should correct it. haha but it's auto correct once sch starts anyway, so watever.


fri to tues holiday. wed finish all outstanding work (geog pt, ss pt, taiwan stuff etc). thu to fri psb chalet. fri osl meeting. sat to sun church chalet?. mon to tues osl working camp. wed let's rock climbing competition. thu school start.

:( I WANT MY HOLIDAYS!

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

nearly two weeks past! :/ the hols is gonna end too soon, too early. just like always.


osl meeting today. haha mentors are the best <3 3/4 of the time, we digress. and we reminisce about the times when we were sec threes (even though it wasnt that long ago). sigh, i really really miss osl 07.

anyway, there's really a big difference in sec three and sec four. in sec three, all that you're concerned about is coping with your commitments, making sure you're doing wel academically, and all you talk about is your commitments and your academics. but once you're in sec four, you start talking about jc and jc life. you start talking about how much things will change once you enter jc.


kind of a scary thought, going jc. when i still feel like a primary school kid. :/ the security guard might stop me and ask if i'm in the wrong school... or maybe i dont look that young xD



going malaysia on friday, only back on tuesday. cant wait, i want to go there and just relax and have fun, and not think of geog and ss pt! (: havent driven up to msia in the longest time ever. i predict the 6 hours journey to kuantan will be uncomfortable. cos you've got a 19 year old guy, a 16 year old me, and my 11 year old bro (who's not that skinny) squashed up in a car. ah well, part of the fun right?




was just looking through all my letters just now (after lunch and bowling with my dad and jon and coming home and sleeping) and the letters. brings back lots of memories. some that i never knew existed. but mostly, just gives me this wave of sadness? especially letters written last year. i dont know, feel like i disappointed them. or maybe it's just me. and anyway, i doubt it matters to them anymore. cos they've moved on, right?




still missing 2007.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

yay! finished philo essay. with 800 words on the dot xD







unable to come to a resolution.
how it happens that the same thing can impact two people so different is really amazing. i mean, sure no one gains the same things out of an amazing, but one that is completely different, like black and white difference, just totally astounds me.


philo sucks. 800 word target is totally impossible to meet, unless it's 80% crap. no wonder we're that good at crapping.




stayed home the whole day. after philo, the only hw i'm left with is geog and ss pt. which i promise i WILL get a start on before end hols.




really really dont want july.

Monday, June 02, 2008

seriously, i dont understand how people can not bother to talk to you for the whole holidays, yet when you're back in school, expect you to be best friends sorta. or maybe it's just me. either ways, i just feel kinda like a lost touch.




on another note, i wonder what my life will be like if i went to dunman instead of raffles. i'd definitely have gone there, if not for my freak psle. maybe i'd have more of a life. went out more, dont think so much about grades and the future, not brainwashed so much about switching lights fans aircons off, safety concerns, proper protocol, maintaining school image and all.
on the other hand, i would never have gotten into rock climbing and outdoor stuff, never known the friends i know now, never have become the person i am now. and i really think the school should gain most credit. cos it's because of the school (or rather, the programmes and teachers) that i am who i am now. whether good, or bad. is it possible to feel both at once?





i really hope to spend the next few days finishing all my hw. so i can have the last two weeks of holidays free from worry.
Complicated - Avril Lavigne
Uh Huh
Life's like this
Uh Huh
Uh Huh
That's the way it is

Cause life's like this
Uh Huh
Uh Huh
That's the way it is

Chill out
What you yellin for?
Lay back
It's all been done before
And if you could only let it be
You will see

I like you the way you are
When we're drivin in your car
And you're talkin to me one-on-one
But you become

Somebody else
Round everyone else
Watchin your back
Like you can't relax
You tryin to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're actin like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get
And you turn into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no

You come over unannounced
Dressed up like you're somethin else
Where you are and where it's at you see
You're makin me
Laugh out
When you strike a pose
Take off
All your preppy clothes
You know
You're not foolin anyone
When you become

Somebody else
Round everyone else
Watchin your back
Like you can't relax
You tryin to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're actin like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get
And you turn into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no
(no no no)
No no
(no no no)
No no
(no no no)
No no

Chill out
What you yellin for?
Lay back
It's all been done before
And if you could only let it be
You will see

Somebody else
Round everyone else
Watchin your back
Like you can't relax
You tryin to be cool
You look like a fool to me
Tell me

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're actin like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get
And you turn into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no

Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
(yeah yeah)
I see the way you're actin like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break and you take what you get
And you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no




honestly. i'm afraid one day i'll go out and see you totally different. and it scares me.
apcg meeting today. then went to bishan library to do math with soff xD haha and physics. it was amusing anyways.

got home and just slept all through till dinner. utterly ridiculous, i had wanted to complete my chem assignment and eng compre. nvm, i'm determined to finish all my hw by end of hols
1) chem assignment
2) eng compre
3) geog pt
4) ss pt

as well as study math and physics. at least.



holiday from friday till tuesday. then wed to fri psb chalet. fri osl meeting. fri to sun church chalet (hours of endless bridge i expect). mon to tues osl camp. wed let's rock (it's a climbing comp by spring field sec). thu sch start.



endless reminiscing.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

i hate this.







makes me feel like a failure. or maybe i am?







btw, tag died from lack of usage.






one can never have a perfect day. maybe, without internet, it's possible.