In brief...

I'm a Nature-lover, aspiring conservationist, and wannabe traveller in search of outdoor adventure.
My interests vary from conservation to education to heritage to Nature (biodiversity & wildlife) to outdoor activities to life in general.
They occupy most of my waking moment.
Do read my blogs, follow me on Twitter (@jocelynesze) and friend me on Facebook (subject to my discretion). Visit my Nature blog, Nature Rambles, at http://natureramble.wordpress.com.

UPDATE 2 Apr 2017 - This site is no longer maintained, please visit jocelynesze.wordpress.com if you're interested in more recent writing.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

remind me again that i should never read people's blogs before blogging myself, cos it totally spoils my mood.


anyway, took level two climbing today(: really happy about it, cos it means a step nearer to uh, becoming a wall supervisor and then a climbing instructor! and like i told soff today, i'll have a backup plan just in case i'm a failure in jc/uni. (:


taiwan aunt and cousin came over. uhh didnt really talk much to them (cousin's same age as my younger bro, and he's really spoilt) but well, their coming over gives cause for celebration. so my mom bought pizza from The Pizza Place and we had pizza and potato salad. i'm full now, really full :/




do you think it'd be tougher in an all girls' school or a mixed school? cos in an all girls' school now (like right now) almost everywhere you go, all you see is people dieting/saying they're fat (even when they're not). and there arent even guys in the school to show off your figure or whatever it is. (unless you count teachers...) or maybe it's in preparation for jc -.-

it's darned annoying, and damn difficult to keep a proper diet (like proper meals) when almost everyone around you are eating healthy/not eating. thank goodness for my class(: always a full table with everyone eating(:

like seriously, what's the point of dieting? after all, when you die, no one's gonna care if you were skinny or fat. no one's gonna remember that. they'll remember what good deeds you did, or your character, or stuff like. right? or is today's society becoming so image-conscious that in your epitaph, people will write "she will forever be fondly remembered as someone who was exceptionally skinny"

argh, okay shall get off the annoying topic.






tomorrow's friday! celebrate(: and chinese mock exam's been postponed :D shall go kayaking on sat. even if my dad thinks i should stay at home and STUDY >:( who said i was mugger, i think it's my dad who is mugger.



but yeah, i should seriously get started on a study timetable. even if i dont follow it.









Wiang Kaen, Chiang Rai, Thailand. i have been going there every year with my family since 2003(:

2003
that's me with my little bro. bad shot :/
uhh group shot in the little church/chapel. it's a Catholic Mission Home, so yep. most of the kids there aren't Catholics though. and i went with my mom's friend's family and her other friends that year, so yep.
my little bro when he was still skinny.
they always do their Hmong culture dance for us every year. those are their traditional costumes, in villages, you still see some of them wearing that. mm and they're all handmade.
group picture(:
how they pumped water. mm i think they've got piped water now though...
she's still in the Mission Home now, only older :P as we all grow older. Duang Chai, she's really cute.
my older bro and i. heh i still had fringe then :P
i tell you, my younger bro's damn cute. btw these pictures were taken in chiang mai, at some restaurant.


okay due to time constraints (or rather i'm too lazy) i shall just upload 2007 photos. 2004, 2006 ones another time then!

2007
the little boy's disabled. obv he has no access to health care or anything :/ he's really cute though. my dad's friend's sister who went with us gave him the cap.
they've got clean(er) water now! different village though, my family (with the Sister and the Father from the Mission Home) goes to different villages every year.
scenary's really beautiful up there(: the village's on a mountain btw.
one of the better houses next to the "main road" it's made of brick and wood, and the roof's zinc (if i'm not wrong). most of the houses deeper inside the village are still thatched, and have gaps in the walls :/
like this house. even though it's in yet another village.
it's really high up you know. and the pics arent in any order, just random.
little black pigs can be found all over the village. as with chickens and dogs. and cows.
walking to school.
little kids there play with chicken hoops. little kids here play with hula hoops.
actually it's more like video games, but hula hoops rhyme with chicken hoops.
my younger bro and i. he's not so cute anymore, but still quite cute lah. we're sitting in a pick up. it brings us to the various villages. person in the background's my dad's friend.
person on the left most is the Sister (nun) in charge of the Mission Home. the person carrying the baby used to stay at the Mission Home, but left to get married (after schooling). and yeah, last year my family went around giving those plastic bags that she's holding. it had a blanket, a jacket, and some foodstuff. (i dont think giving things really help long term, but well.)there were many stalls by the road side selling strawberries! and strawberry juice, which is really nice(: and strawberry wine...
opium field.
we bought a lot of blankets. and jackets. at a rather discounted price.
and my younger brother tries to prove that he's still quite small...
oh when we went, it was christmas time. and that's the pig they killed to cook christmas dinner (actually lunch) for the parishioners (:/ i think i spelt that wrongly. but in any case, it refersthe people who go to church) the pig died a horrible death i think. i heard it's squealing. didnt dare watch the killing.
this is Duang Chai again, 4 years later.

and i have lots of other photos with (of) the kids there. and i think i'm missing more... still stuck in my mom's comp i think..


Alisha. i'm proud to say i can still remember their names(: see, their childhood involves climbing trees. ours involve climbing stairs.


okay not funny. but yeah, even though they are considered "less privileged" and everything, they still have a happy childhood.




and isnt that what matters most? happiness?

Wednesday, July 30, 2008

even though it's over rated. cos it's one of the few songs that makes me feel like bouncing whenever i hear it:

I'm Yours - Jason Mraz
Well you done done me and you bet I felt it
I tried to be chill but you're so hot that I melted
I fell right through the cracks
Now I'm trying to get back
Before the cool done run out
I'll be giving it my bestest
Nothing's going to stop me but divine intervention
I reckon it's again my turn to win some or learn some

But I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait, I'm yours

Well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love, love, love, love
Listen to the music of the moment, people dance and sing
We're just one big family
It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love loved love love

So I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

I've been spending way too long checking my tongue in the mirror
And bending over backwards just to try to see you clearer
But my breath fogged up the glass
And so I drew a face and I laughed
I guess what I be saying is there ain't no better reason
To rid yourself of vanities and just go with the seasons
It's what we aim to do
Our name is our virtue

But I won't hesitate no more, no more
It cannot wait I'm yours
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

Well no no, well open up your mind and see like me
Open up your plans and damn you're free
Look into your heart and you'll find love love love love
Listen to the music of the moment come and dance with me
I like one big family
It's our God-forsaken right to be loved love love love

I won't hesitate no more
Oh no more no more no more
It's your God-forsaken right to be loved, I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours

No I won't hesitate no more, no more
This cannot wait I'm sure
There's no need to complicate
Our time is short
This is our fate, I'm yours, I'm yours




and for those out there who need it:

Hold On - Good Charlotte
This world
This world is cold
But you don't
You don't have to go
You're feeling sad, you're feeling lonely, and no one seems to care
You're mother's gone and your father hits you
This pain you cannot bear

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know

Your days
You say they're way too long
And your nights
You can't sleep at all
Hold on
And you're not sure what you're waiting for, but you don't want to no more
And you're not sure what you're looking for, but you don't want to no more

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking, you're one step closer
Don't stop searching, it's not over
Hold on

What are you looking for?
What are you waiting for?
Do you know what you're doing to me?
Go ahead...What are you waiting for?

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking, you're one step closer
Don't stop searching, it's not over
Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Hold on







and i know that we're gonna be fine.
swimathon!

it's quite cool actually, but if only they could make everyone go for it or sth.. like declare sch holiday..

swum 10 laps in 25m pool and 10 laps in 50m pool.. which is nothing compared to juan's 26 laps in 50m pool, but still! considering the last time i swum so much was probably in pri sch..

cos i dont have a cert, so had to go for swimming trial (4 laps in 50m pool and 3min tread water) she didnt believe me when i said i was in competitive swimming in pri sch! >:( even though i was really lousy at it lah, that's why i quit right...



anyway, back to ss pt :( i'll be glad when it's over.


level two tmr(:

Tuesday, July 29, 2008

today started off pretty fine, but ended like crap.

decided to sleep in the foyer while waiting for morning assembly again. save me the trouble of walking up and down 5 flights of stairs.


math was first block, and it turned out that she was on mc, so well, get well soon ms tan! but thanks for the break anyway :P
after that was chi oral D: haha my group's the best, we were all lying on the floor of ks chee sleeping :P before our turn. anyway, it went quite fine, i'm quite satisfied(: but booo, i'm time-keeper for tmr, meaning i dont get my free block >:(
after that was chem and physics.


then, finally, i thought i could go climbing. cos the last time i climbed was springfest and that was in june. anyway, had to wait for juan for one more block, so when soff suggested waffles, a bunch of class still left in class went(: photos soon, i promise!(:

came back, and found out that juan had ndp rehearsal cos she's her class' narrator for fashion parade. so while we were uh, trying to solve the problem, reshmi throws the ultimate at me: that our class submitted my name for our class narrator. so if she pons (cos she was going to replace me), i would be booked. so hurray, hurray, problem solved, i have to go for ndp rehearsal too.
:( and i was sooo looking forward to climbing okay. sigh.



i dont care, i'm going climbing next week. and mr chew says we can become climbing instructors :D:D


ndp rehearsal was just plain (insert word here) but i'm sure you know what i want to say.







i cant believe how fast time flies. but then again, it seems like the dwen an people came so long ago, even though it was only 26 days ago. only 26 days, but it feels like a lifetime. and apcg ended just over a week ago, yet it seemed like ages ago. maybe my perception of time is skewed, but really. the whole month of july seem to stretch for so long, so long. in fact, my entire year seemed to revolve around july. cos now, dwen an's over, and apcg's over. and those were my main two events.
i was dreading, yet looking forward, to july. and now, july's nearly over. august (handover and eyas) is coming up next.






407 :D
tired, anyone? xD
being bored during free block, we decided to switch specs :P
after sch (12.20pm!) at Gelare!:D:D

kalya and soff!(:liangsi and liangzi!(:
soffia, me and eunice!(:
soff (heh xD) taking the last piece! we demolished three waffles in total(:

from class phototaking, which was a really long time ago!
soff, roy, me and eunice. haha eunice FAIL at looking cool.

from chinese new year, which was really, really long ago
reshmi and me!

going to tiger breweries, which was in march, which was really long ago too...
me and soff.

from sports fest, which was in april? which was a really long time ago too...
kalya, liangzi!, and me(:




right, i'm still waiting for rhd photos... another time then(:

Monday, July 28, 2008

my new goal: for the rest of term 3, to go offline by 11.45pm, sleep by 12am.


but wait, before i be a good girl and put myself to bed, i'm waiting for this super funny video to upload.

chem pt filming was funny(: i enjoyed doing the experiments and stuff (just not waiting for a thousand and one converters to download)


righto, here's it




haha sorry soff :P couldnt resist. that and the cooking in cambodia ("i think it's not colourful enough leh." "let's add this! it's red, and it's hot!") makes you the best :D







stop taking it too hard on yourself, you're scaring me. eat and sleep more can?
and you. i have no idea what to do with you. you havent given me much faith in you, you know. i try, but almost always, i get disappointed.








btw, i had the weirdest dream while napping today. dreamt of MATH of all things. and the person in the dream was doing it damn fast D:
yay tomorrow school ends at 12 NOON!!! you know how exciting that prospect is??? :D:D

and i went straight home after school today(: read newspapers (finally) ate and slept. exciting, no?


i'm so going climbing tomorrow. even if i'm going alone :(




today was an utterly rubbish day (of lessons)
geog was well, i managed to stay awake for the first half... slept a little here and there...
bio was >< style="font-style: italic;">which was really encouraging you know. it totally made me feel like i should continue studying bio in jc, uni, and as a job. sometimes, i wonder why he does that. he means well i suppose, but it's overdone. it kills interest.
pe was um, really hot. and i hate being pe rep! smart eunice thought it would be a brilliant idea to be one.
eng was okay... started drifting off towards the end as well..
ss was the best! i think i slept through most of the presentations (as with all other ppl who stayed up late to do chem pt-.-)
math was just presentations. thankfully i managed to stay awake.


and a lot of people were absent today. some sick, some well, i dont really want to know.




seriously looking forward to sept hols. AFTER EYAS.

and nat day weekend's gonna be interesting(:



Crash and Burn - Savage Garden
When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give me a moment please to tame your wild wild heart
I know you feel like the walls are closing in on you
Its hard to find relief and people can be so cold
When darkness is upon your door and you feel like you cant take anymore

Let me be the one you call
If you jump Ill break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
Youre not alone

When you feel all alone
And a loyal friend is hard to find
Youre caught in a one way street
With the monsters in your head
When hopes and dreams are far away and
You feel like you cant face the day

Let me be the one you call
If you jump Ill break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
Youre not alone

And there has always been heartache and pain
And when its over youll breathe again
Youll breath again

When you feel all alone
And the world has turned its back on you
Give me a moment please
To tame your wild wild heart

Let me be the one you call
If you jump Ill break your fall
Lift you up and fly away with you into the night
If you need to fall apart
I can mend a broken heart
If you need to crash then crash and burn
Youre not alone






really random, but anyway, the taxi driver who sent me to bedok reservoir from sch on sat was really friendly. he was uh telling me about how when people in my sch grow up, we will all get big-shot jobs with plenty of ppl under us, and so we should learn to empathise with them now, but taking up jobs in macs. so that when we do have people under us, we will treat them nicely and not always scold them. at least that was the lesson i think he was trying to impart to me...





chi oral tmr D:
我要多读报纸,练口试。 不可以fail 口试!!! ><

Sunday, July 27, 2008

right i know i shouldnt be giving in to temptation and should have more self control. it's past 1am and i should be sleeping.


but i'm finally, finally done with chem pt!

after stressing so much over it during apcg week, losing copper(II)sulphate, having one day of prep experiment at home and 2 days of filming in school. after spending about, 11-12 hours downloading various converters, editors, screaming in frustration (exageration), pigging out. after roy's kind neighbour finally sent us a converter (that was NOT free trial version, the stupid things). after spending a further 5 hours editing the video, and another 2 hours for EVERYTHING to be finished.


finally, finally, finally! i rejoice :D
and it's quite cool you know...







anyway, was in church today, and i saw this little kid getting carried by his father. and it just occured to me, that when we were little kids, when we were tired, we just demanded to be carried. when we were upset, we just cried, and the adults would solve the problem for us (whether it's our siblings bullying us, or an empty stomach, or anything).
yet in sec sch, suddenly, everything is thrown on us (or rather, we're not as willing to share)
when we were tired, we still had to carry on. move along. when we were upset, we still had to put up a facade, a front. move along.

all in all, i miss childhood. i miss being a little kid. (still very much one though. after all, once you're in like, uni or sth, you cant ever be like that any more. i think kids should just be left alone, and not forced to do grown up stuff. cos sooner or later, they'll grow up, and then, even if you want them to, they wont do such stuff anymore)







and again, while blog surfing ytd, i wonder, what if i went to another sch instead?







Success
To laugh often and much;

To win the respect of intelligent people
and the affection of children;

To earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;

To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;

To leave the world a bit better, whether by
a healthy child, a garden patch
or a redeemed social condition;

To know even one life has breathed
easier because you have lived;

This is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson

World - Five For Fighting
Got a package full of wishes
A time machine, a magic wand
A globe made out of gold
No instructions or commandments,
Laws of gravity or indecisions to uphold
Printed on the box I see: ACME's Build a World to Be.
Take a chance, grab a piece
Help me to believe it

What kind of world do you want
Think anything
Let’s start at the start
Build a masterpiece
Be careful what you wish for
History starts now

Should there be people or peoples
Money, funny pedestals
For fools who never pay
Raise your army, choose your steeple
Don’t be shy, the satellites can look the other way
Lose the earthquakes, keep the faults
Fill the oceans without the salt
Let every man own his own hand.
Can you dig it baby?

What kind of world do you want
Think anything
Let’s start at the start
Build a masterpiece
Be careful what you wish for
History starts now

Sunlight’s on the bridge
Sunlight’s on the way
Tomorrow’s calling
There’s more to this than love

What kind of world do you want
(x3)
Think anything
Let's start at the start
Build a masterpiece
History starts now
Starts now
Be careful what you wish for

Start now
Now...





expect to be sleeping in class tmr again :/

Saturday, July 26, 2008

why do people read blogs? i dont quite understand... for me, i read other people's blogs just to keep updated on their lives, especially if we're not really close. to know what they think of certain issues that they dont share, if we're quite close. for entertainment?

and why do i blog then? i guess it's just like a diary, only it's online, for everyone to see. and it sorta lasts forever. like maybe 10 years down the road, if you've abandoned your old blog, you can still go back and read your past childish entries.








math test today was nearly a disaster. ran out of time, didnt manage to finish some parts of two questions :/ i hope i didnt make any careless mistake and can get a somewhat decent grade...

cabbed down for kayaking after, cost me like 11 bucks ><>:( washed it off in the reservoir, so if you stay around bedok, and suddenly your water has a hint of chocolate cake, you'll know why :P
that one hour in the water was really fun anyway. capped various people, got capped (heh but i din go down with my kayak, i escaped xD), splashed around, so everyone got wet anyway, even though we werent allowed to swim :P yep, so it was a rather fun training(:
even though the attendance was like, slightly more than half of what was expected.

lunch-ed with sihui, siling, jas, parisa and suyun at pastamania, tampines. the amount of cheese they put into their food! it's super scary! and parisa and suyun eats cheese like... they just pour it into their spoons! scary D:

after that was chem pt. which. was. utterly. stupid. argh! like seriously... had problems uploading the videos into my comp (cos ran out of space -.-), had problems trying to find softwares to convert .mov into something recognized by windows movie player, had problems downloading them, had problems converting (cos free trials convert just 50% of your files -.-). and the problems took like, 4-5 hours to solve. started about 3. and by 7, it suddenly occured to us that we should just download a software that recognizes .mov files... thankfully, during that 4-5 hours, we figured out which videos we wanted and stuff, to save time.but it turns out that the other software (video edit magic) has to convert all files into .avi format first. and it's taking a damn long time. still converting now.... so all in all, we still have to meet up tomorrow.><

and soff and i couldnt go for dramafeste cos of all this crap! ah wells.









remember your primary school days? when you felt like you knew everything, when you felt that the world revolved around you, that you were really important. i see the primary school kids now, and that's what i feel about them. but when you go to secondary school, self-awareness suddenly sets in. you get self-conscious, feel inferior, feel like shite at times. i guess mrs deborah tan wasnt joking when she said that secondary school is when you grow up (or at least that's what i think she said. was sleeping during most of the s1 talks...) one of the most important times of your life, when life-changing events happen. when you build your character. when you learn more about the world around you.






on a side note, felt damn stupid yesterday... cos had to wash clothes. so i happily (tiredly) dumped all the dirty clothes since thursday into the washing machine and switched it on. and after it was done (after i was done "studying" math) went to hang it up. and halfway through hanging the clothes, it occurred to me that i forgot to put detergent in -.-






blogs let you see how different others' lives are from yours. how different choices take you through different lives. how life might have been if you had made a different choice.

Friday, July 25, 2008

well, the questions never stop haunting me do they. time and again, i am asked the same question. and the answer is always the same. have i? if you ask me what is the most significant thing i've done, i'll still say none, now and forever. if you ask me what i think i could have improved on, i could have writted you an essay.

that tomorrow's the last training in my term, the very last one. but still, i have people telling me things that i dont really want to hear/know, especially since it's the last one. and the number of times i have forgotten to collect various stuff, or do certain things, or inform others. really, the number of things i did not do right, far outnumber the things i supposedly have done right. and somehow, it's always the mistakes that haunt me.






anyway, so went for ri dramafeste today with soff.. haha i think only us and jo ou are the only ones smart enough to go for such a thing the night before our math:/ in any case, it was quite good, bayley. light hearted and funny, albeit a skewed (sick) sense of humour D: i couldnt understand half the jokes... ah wells. moor (theodore director and yuda the ap guy) was really serious, emo and drama. scary. and morrison's was dance-y and emo too. :/ wish i could go for tomorrow's, hullett (zaki's acting) and buckley (shou jian's director)! i think, if my memory doesnt fail me....



kay gotta sleep now, math test ><




Superman - Five For Fighting
I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
I’m just out to find
The better part of me

I’m more than a bird...i’m more than a plane
More than some pretty face beside a train
It’s not easy to be me

Wish that I could cry
Fall upon my knees
Find a way to lie
About a home I’ll never see

It may sound absurd...but don’t be naive
Even heroes have the right to bleed
I may be disturbed...but won’t you concede
Even heroes have the right to dream
It’s not easy to be me

Up, up and away...away from me
It’s all right...you can all sleep sound tonight
I’m not crazy...or anything...

I can’t stand to fly
I’m not that naive
Men weren’t meant to ride
With clouds between their knees

I’m only a man in a silly red sheet
Digging for kryptonite on this one way street
Only a man in a funny red sheet
Looking for special things inside of me
Inside of me
Inside me
Yeah, inside me
Inside of me

I’m only a man
In a funny red sheet
I’m only a man
Looking for a dream

I’m only a man
In a funny red sheet
And it’s not easy, hmmm, hmmm, hmmm...

Its not easy to be me

Thursday, July 24, 2008

feel a sudden overwhelming desire to post on wales. i really miss the weather, the beautiful scenary, the peaceful tranquility of life there.









i really miss waking up in the mornings, feeling so cold. going down for breakfast, which was really good. theory lessons in the geog lab, asking mr lim what the temperature was (cos it was seriously cold), packing lunch, going down to the salt marsh or rocky shore or beach, coming back for more theory and the very good dinner. i really miss the sea breeze, the clear and uncluttered sky, the cool climate, the carefree and happy times there.
but then again, i guess i should be thankful for the opportunity to be there in the first place(:
feeling slightly stressed. quite a bit of things to do, but i dont seem to be able to do them. like no motivation or no time or sth.



so after the screw up of ol award interview ytd, i fear the screw up of my write up for ora community service award. but many thanks to mr lim for nominating me in the first place anyway(: really, quite surprising. i dont think i did much.



so my parents have left for their aniversary vacation to Koh Samui, and the computer workplace seems strangely empty without them.

gonna be back home late tmr cos of dramafeste, dont think i'm going to have enough time to do last minute mugging for math the next day :/ gotta sleep early.

and chem pt's due mon. ss pt on fri (thank goodness). and i really feel like i should start studying for some subjects.



but for some reason or another, i'm not doing what i should be.





interesting cle lesson today. we should appreciate life as we have it, count our blessings, use time wisely, dont stress too much, take time to appreciate nature. relax, do brain gym/yoga stuff. as she likes to tell us, "i paid a few thousand dollars to learn this technique, i'm teaching it to you now for free!".
and soff makes the funniest comments. "your nostrils are only fully open at 12 midnight and 12 noon." "so at these times we should breathe more???"


let me now teach you a technique. cross your last finger with your fourth and put down your second and middle finger. close one nostril with your thumb, breathe in and out with the open nostril. now using your fourth finger, close the other nostril and breathe in and out. repeat 9 times. it's supposed to help you breathe better/relax/study better. cos you get more oxygen in your brain.






and now, back to dy/dx and d^2/dx^2.








i really really cant wait for sept hols.

Hold On - Jet (Spiderman 2 soundtrack)
You tried so hard to be someone
That you forgot who you are

You tried to fill some emptiness
Till all you had spilled over

Now everything's so far away
That you don't know where you are
You are

(Chorus)
When all that you wanted
When all that you had don't seem so much
For you to hold onto
For you to hold onto

For you to belong to

When it's hard to be yourself
It's not to be someone else

Still everything's so far away
That you forget where you are
You are

(Chorus)
When all that you wanted
When all that you had don't seem so much
For you to hold onto
For you to hold onto

Hold on [4x]

Hold on [4x]

(Chorus)
When all that you wanted
When all that you had don't seem so much
For you to hold onto
For you to hold onto
For you to hold onto

For you to belong to


Hold On - Good Charlotte
This world
This world is cold
But you don't
You don't have to go
You're feeling sad, you're feeling lonely, and no one seems to care
You're mother's gone and your father hits you
This pain you cannot bear

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know

Your days
You say they're way too long
And your nights
You can't sleep at all
Hold on
And you're not sure what you're waiting for, but you don't want to no more
And you're not sure what you're looking for, but you don't want to no more

But we all bleed the same way as you do
And we all have the same things to go through

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking, you're one step closer
Don't stop searching, it's not over
Hold on

What are you looking for?
What are you waiting for?
Do you know what you're doing to me?
Go ahead...What are you waiting for?

Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Don't stop looking, you're one step closer
Don't stop searching, it's not over
Hold on if you feel like letting go
Hold on it gets better than you know
Hold on



If We Hold On Together - Diana Ross
Don't lose your way
With each passing day
You've come so far
Don't throw it away
Live believing
Dreams are for weaving
Wonders are waiting to start
Live your story
Faith, hope & glory
Hold to the truth in your heart

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

Souls in the wind
Must learn how to bend
Seek out a star
Hold on to the end
Valley, mountain
There is a fountain
Washes our tears all away
Words are swaying
Someone is praying
Please let us come home to stay

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
Where clouds roll by
For you and I

When we are out there in the dark
We'll dream about the sun
In the dark we'll feel the light
Warm our hearts, everyone

If we hold on together
I know our dreams will never die
Dreams see us through to forever
As high as souls can fly
The clouds roll by
For you and I

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

time's flying past so quickly. it seems so long ago when i went to taiwan in jan. and i really miss those times. and it's now exactly one week after the campfire during apcg. just imagine, one week ago, we were seated at the parade square around a fire watching the ri scouts put up a performance. and then, there was still two more days before apcg ended. okay i think i'm living too much in the past.

but if all i see in the future is dy/dx. or pressure. or alkanes, alkenes and alcohols. or biogenetic engineering (which isn't that bad). point being, honestly, i'm so caught up with doing hw that i hardly have the time to do what i want anymore. haven't been climbing for ages. and to slow down and take a second look at the sky, fluffy clouds and sunsets seem to be a waste of time. and apart from during odac sessions, i hardly have the time (or perhaps, the will) to exercise.

and really, i'd like to put in more effort into each and everyone of my subjects (except maybe geography, cos who cares) but if your function is increasing when your x value is decreasing, function being your workload and x value being time (haha i'm not sure that makes sense), then really there's not much preparing for lessons that one can do.




or maybe it's just time management. if i spend less time on the computer, less time walking around and doing nothing (except taking a breather and admiring the scenary), less time eating (maybe that's why majority of rg girls' height weight % is never 100%), maybe then, i'd be able to do all that i want.








and the faster time passes, the more i realise that i have less time to spend with the friends i have now. cos if we're not taking the same subj combi (or similar) and we're not gonna join the same ccas, then how often would i be able to see you? walk around and talk rubbish with you? and you realise, as you grow older, even though you know more friends, you have less friends. because slowly, one by one, they disappear, as your path and theirs diverge. but i guess i should be thankful that in the first place, our paths even crossed.



anyway, here's a fill-in-the-blank for the day.

-on the topic of who would want to go for FAM-
soff:"yeah, and JC's fam would be even more (insert word here)"

she actually said "insert word here" lor:P

haha i'm seriously gonna miss her if she disappears from my life in jc. she'd better not(:





and cos i'm too distracted to do math, even though it's sitting in stacks in front of me, here are photos!(:

carillon 08!<3>
the pretty banner(:elaine, jo-ann and I(: [or is it me? sheesh my grammar's going]

okay i realise i dont have that many photos of carillon...



apcg photos again!
group 4(:
looks pretty cool doesnt it! full (or close to) moon that night. one week ago D:

and a series of soff and me cam-whoring




hahah i realise soff looks quite spastic in most of them xD anyway i still have many other photos with her taken in various places since last year D:

all 50 of us!(:
the times gone by.



okay i shall go back to math.




btw, ol award interview today was so screwed up. felt nearly in tears by the end of it.



cos again, will i leave knowing that i have left my mark in odac? knowing that i've done something worth leaving behind? knowing that i've done my best?


but best is never good enough, is it.







you try so hard to keep afloat, that it's hard to start flying.