In brief...

I'm a Nature-lover, aspiring conservationist, and wannabe traveller in search of outdoor adventure.
My interests vary from conservation to education to heritage to Nature (biodiversity & wildlife) to outdoor activities to life in general.
They occupy most of my waking moment.
Do read my blogs, follow me on Twitter (@jocelynesze) and friend me on Facebook (subject to my discretion). Visit my Nature blog, Nature Rambles, at http://natureramble.wordpress.com.

UPDATE 2 Apr 2017 - This site is no longer maintained, please visit jocelynesze.wordpress.com if you're interested in more recent writing.

Sunday, May 31, 2009

had quite a lot of stuff to blog, but tired now and feeling pretty stressed (over the holidays! :/) so shall blog tmr instead.


and i cannot see how i can fit everything into these miserable 4 weeks! srp (so dead, i can foresee a damn fail project), climbing (and i need to train moree.. at least i want to..), STUDYING, PW, and like outings and stuff. sheesh.


and it's only the start of holidays. can they rename that please? it's such a euphemism for.. i dno, time compressing? k nvm.


have fun during your hols people! as stressful as it is :/

Saturday, May 30, 2009

morning at sentosa was awesome :D didnt really see cool stuff like octopus and sea stars and sea cucumbers and the like, but just being out there on the shore, was good enough.

it really kinda affirms that my decision to join the ccas i joined was the right one. in the end, it really just boils down to what you really want, and what will make you happy. admittedly, i'm missing out on a lot of stuff about jc life; but on the other hand, i am doing things that well, make me happy. not joining heavy-commitment ccas means that i can concentrate my time on other stuff.




at sentosa today with dr loo's classes, and rsi people.saw some pretty cool stuff
fan worms naked hermit crabs (probably moulting or sth like that), according to dr loo.
hairy crabs
elbow crab shark egg case (albeit a rotting one)carpet anemone
a really crappy photo of a glass shrimp, but if you can see the stripes of white in the reflection of dr loo's head... glass shrimps and carpet anemone have a symbiotic relationship, much like the clownfish (nemo!) and anemone.
wading back to shore before the tide really came in and cos the dark clouds started to gather. oh and saw seagrasses too(: halophila, thalassia and enhalus and what looks to be halodule, but i'm not too sure..




and cos i cant rmb if i've uploaded these photos before. think i have though. pulau semakau! :D ah wells, no harm seeing them again (:
a super big/fat nudibranch. finger is there for comparison.
octopus! :D
a frog fish, cos of the web-like fins, i think. which is hmm toxic? the spines on the back of it, if you can see them. sth bad happens lah, if you step on it...
a pretty hostile elbow crab, if i'm not wrong..
female flower of Enhalus acoroides, a type of seagrass(:
common sea star, i think.

(: isnt it cool that you can see these kind of stuff in Singapore, and not have to go to like, malaysia? though of course, it development and construction and reclamation continue, we might not have any shores left, shores that support such awesome marine life.

Friday, May 29, 2009

this week was a pretty horrid week. but at least today ended well(: maybe cos it's the LAST day of sch term :D


shant talk about the horrid week (GP test and all), which peaked at failing chem test :( sighs but okay, thanks to the people who painstakingly listened through my intense whining(:
maybe i'm just too harsh on myself, setting pretty high standards. though really, i shouldnt have failed it; i didnt have an excuse. and i guess the test is just a reminder that i'm not a naturally smart student, unlike some people. i need to study, and hard, for my grades.

and mass convo with shaina and nair last night made me my day a lot better (: sighhs miss last year a lot, srsly. and i miss soff's crap :( ah wells. at least i get to see juan everyday, up there (for once she gets to look down on people xD) and soff once a week, raising the bb flag..




class outing after sch was pretty fun :D and climbing was awesome. seriously, cleared the 6c routes (: but sun's a lead :/ ah wells.




tired out. sentosa tmr (:


shant think about the amount of work to do during the hols.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

envirofest ytd was pretty interesting. and it makes me see the worth in learning and knowing chinese. 海牛吃海草! dugongs (haha their scientific name's Dugong dugon! also known as seacows) eat seagrass.

going back to rg for open house was quite awesome, i think. met and talked to a few teachers and juniors, and i really, really miss rg. i miss the fact that i didnt have to worry about finishing tutorials and catching up with lectures, because we had none. that my greatest concern was my cca and other commitments, and not my academics. that i had other stuff to think about, instead of just homework. not that i dont have any now, but homework somehow takes up more space and is of a greater priority now.


was totally in a holiday mood already, even though there's still so much to do for this last week of school. and i really dont see much chance for a reprieve during the june hols. and i am actually very scared of the june hols. so much to do, crammed into that little, 4 weeks, excuse-of-a-break. seriously, once you enter jc, they should rename june holidays, to june time-to-do-everything-that-you-didnt-manage-to-do-during-the-term.




and i realise that things really do only come to people who ask for it. my younger brother got a phone (that's newer/nicer than mine), because he threw a tantrum and refused to study.
hai, and i wonder why my parents insisted on giving me and my older bro a joint bday present of a bicycle, cos so far the only person who's been using it has been my older bro.

ah wells. i suppose i have better things to look forward in life than these material goods. unfortunately, at this point in time, the only things in the future seem to be remedial lessons, stacks of homework, studying, and project work. and srp D: and climbing(: thank goodness for climbing, keeps me sane, i think.


well i guess that's enough grousing, i always only talk about the same few things. in fact only one thing, and that there's too much work. but time goes on and it doesnt care whether you've been using it to do useless mundane stuff like updating your blog about how much work there is to do, or whether you used it to study GP.

Friday, May 22, 2009

chem was super !!! T.T hai. even though everyone else said it's damn easy.


climbed (high wall) today, after a damn long time. hai, i need to train more. sucks that have to find additional time to climb, apart from sch commitments.


tmr's last week of sch, and i'm pretty glad. but june hols are gonna be :/ i just hope i can take the time to fully appreciate the 4 weeks of break from school. and not get a burn out.



thinking back, i think rg odac really impacted me a lot. for one, i remember very very clearly, that in sec one, i couldnt do push ups, nor dips, and running was super damn fail.
and like all the debriefs and everything. damned, i miss rg odac :( i miss it especially, during the times when i was in lower sec. hai. i miss PTs.



i just wish, that life wasnt 80% studying now.



and although we always come to the conclusion that 'life sucks', i really dont think it sucks that much. it's just like a catch phrase, nothing better to say, just say life sucks. true, there's a lot to study and lectures and tutorials are terrible, but if you think about it in from a larger perspective, at least you have a somewhat enjoyable cca with friends and stuff like. think about those who dont even have that; wont life suck even more for them?

in any case, i guess it's just about counting your blessings and knowing what you want in life.


Envirofest and rg open house tmr. hopefully there'll be ppl coming down (:




All Star - Smash Mouth
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me
I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed
She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb
In the shape of an "L" on her forehead

Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Back to the rule and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun
Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb

So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

[Chorus:]
Hey now you're an All Star get your game on, go play
Hey now you're a Rock Star get the show on get paid
And all that glitters is gold
Only shooting stars break the mold

It's a cool place and they say it gets colder
You're bundled up now but wait 'til you get older
But the meteor men beg to differ
Judging by the hole in the satellite picture

The ice we skate is getting pretty thin
The waters getting warm so you might as well swim
My world's on fire how about yours
That's the way I like it and I never get bored

[Repeat Chorus 2x]

Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas
I need to get myself away from this place
I said yep what a concept
I could use a little fuel myself
And we could all use a little change
Well the years start coming and they don't stop coming
Back to the rule and I hit the ground running
Didn't make sense not to live for fun Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb
So much to do so much to see
So what's wrong with taking the back streets
You'll never know if you don't go
You'll never shine if you don't glow

[Repeat Chorus]


i really think i'm getting dumber. like seriously.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

had no idea what to expect from pumpfest, since it was the first time participating in intermediate category. but i guess overall it went pretty well for me, though not so well for sam :/

but i think i'm going to have to train a lot more for nsscc. somewhat dreading leading already, saturdays 1-8pm is not gonna be a joke.



and it sucks that always, constantly, perpetually, the hw i have to do is hovering at the back of my mind.

fridays always make me feel super stressed, because of the information overload caused by numerous lectures. i really wonder how the hell people remember all their notes, the two years worth of notes, to regurgitate for A levels and do super damn well. case in point, chem relief tutor. amazes me how after what, 2 years of NS, he can still remember all the shitty crap about chem bonding and uh everything about chem. when he's going to study bio in uni T.T

i never used to think there was much pressure in rg, maybe because then, i didnt really care much about my grades, as long as i was about average. or perhaps, to be more accurate, as long as i didnt get below 3.0 gpa. but now in rj, i suddenly feel this immense pressure, to do well in class assignments, class tests, common tests, promos and every single thing all the way leading up to A levels. which sucks, cos 1) stress isnt good for health, and 2) class tests dont even count in final year grades.

but i guess most people everywhere in jcs are feeling the same, not just in rj.


ah wells, on the bright side, i still have things to look forward to in life, so that i wont give up halfway slogging through the massive spam of hw and revision. which would probably be the purpose of a cca; where you can spend your afternoons concentrating on something else apart from acads, channel your energy and passion into, to keep you going when days are tough, to make friends who hopefully, think and feel the way you do, and to well, simply have something else to do apart from studying.

unless your passion is, quite worryingly, studying.



hai, and i really do wish that rj would allow a climbing club to be set up. to have more support from the school would be great, and to be able to freely train (as part of cca) would be awesome. instead of having to mark out extra time to train (even though my ccas may be pretty slack, they still require commitment) and pay for my trainings and competitions (all in the name of raffles)



but on the bright side, i think at least i should be glad for the fact that my passions and interests still remain the same as what it was in rg. that i have put in more effort into keeping them alive and perhaps, now having more depth than breadth (if you get what i mean)
and i do feel quite comforted by the fact that i have not changed that much in jc, and remained somewhat the same. at least in personality. or so i hope. please do tell me if you feel otherwise. i'm glad i have not turned into some bimbotic, brainless (in a seriously brainless way, and not just for fun), attention-seeking uh, bimbo who flirt with guys (thank God.) and i'm glad to say i've managed to keep out of sick zone, so far. or as well as i can. that's not to say that people who do the above are not good, it's just that i prefer to stay the way i am(: though i'm not too sure what exactly is the way i am..

but this is my own perceived notion of myself, and if in any way you think otherwise, be nice and tell me.






and i'm really seeing less and less of certain people now. which is to be expected and nothing new, really. just pray that where ever they are, whatever they're doing, they'll be happy. take care<3

Friday, May 15, 2009

D: pumpfest tmr! hopefully it turns out, well, decent.



T.T blew $16 on cab fare today, cos 1) it rained, 2) i was running out of time cos of photog session :( and the cab driver didnt know where tmsi was, took me on a merry go round and then back to nus.. then still had to walk down to tmsi, and then walk back. but it was nice, i like the place, full of trees and fresh air and well i didnt see any birds but i heard them (: then cos it started to rain again and i just missed the bus, cabbed to mrt station. sighs.


photog session was pretty interesting (:

and 6/2 gathering was good(: only like 6/7 of us, but was still nice to see them again, and hear them talk about all sorts of stuff.



sighs, really miss pri sch :( when you could do all sorts of crap stuff and it doesnt matter. dont even have to study. ah wells, life goes on, and we cant turn back time.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

mid-week post!

if you think about it, we only have like 12 days of school left! (okay well sorry to everyone who has to come down to schools on sat and/or sun) but somehow or other, they managed to squeeze chinese and gp CTs...


and hilariously, rj is the top jc in bouldering.. and it's ridiculously funny because rj doesnt even have a climbing club and odac doesnt do climbing competitively.


i miss odac PTs :( sighs.




and i'm annoyed by how despite the fact that i do not have a lot of commitments, everything still manages to clash. somehow this didnt happen much last year. despite having more commitments, i think. ah wells.




saw this outside the pe dept.

Discipline and Courage
It takes discipline to look a man in the eyes rather than at his feet, his chest or the space above his shoulders.
It takes discipline to train when it is wet and cold, when all others are at home behind the glass (sihui agrees whole-heartedly to this)
It takes discipline to tell the truth; remember it is just as easy to tell the truth as it is to tell a lie.
It takes discipline to keep your eyes on the ball, the ball symbolising your passion and dreams.
It takes discipline to constantly work on the basics, even when the basics get a little boring.
It takes discipline to practice under pressure so that nothing surprises you during the game.
It takes discipline to get out of bed early; there is nothing like a warm bed in the morning.
It takes discipline to keep running when your legs and lungs feel like they would burst.
It takes discipline to do the little things, even if they don't seem important at the time.
It takes discipline to do an extra lap when everyone else is in the shower (might be missing a word) bar.
It takes discipline to stick with the recipe that you know works for YOU.
It takes discipline to guard against complacency, arrogance and laziness.
It takes discipline to look for the real reasons without making excuses.
It takes discipline to be the first on the training track and the last off it.
It takes discipline to make the right choice rather than the wrong one.
It takes discipline to be punctual, rather than just a few minutes late.
It takes discipline to fight back rather than quit.
It takes discipline to trust your game plan.
It takes discipline to switch off and relax.
It takes discipline to lead by example.
It takes discipline to listen and learn.
It takes discipline to say NO.

It is DISCIPLINE that will take you to the top.
- Australian cricketer Justin Langer



amazed at how some of my friends, like lou, are so motivated to study.
wish i could be outdoors everyday.

Monday, May 11, 2009

today's a bad day. or perhaps, a worse than normal day.

twice in a row, i woke up late. somehow or other, didnt hear my phone alarm (or at least cant recall hearing it), couldnt find my phone beside my bed, flung my blanket around and realised my phone was somewhere on my bed. queer :/ might be a sign of sleep deprivation, that i switched off my phone alarm and went back to sleep but cant rmb it...

so, woke up late today. woke up at the time i was supposed to be meeting sam to climb. which is terrible. (reminds me of the time i woke up late for outram in s2/3 D:) and then when i reached tpjc, i realised i forgot to bring my climbing equipment. how brillianntttt. probably another sign of sleep deprivation, forgetfulness. gah.

and then, when i left the place, i left my wallet behind. and i was alr on the bus by that time -.- but got it back, anyhows, thanks to sam. yay(:



went to this nice pizza place at china square (or far east square, i dont really know) to celebrate jon's bday. hahaa the poor guy, cos my family's thoroughly sick of celebrating bdays, his bday celeb was the saddest. and he has exams on his bday :P ah wells. that's the way life is.



i'm quite amazed at the number of topics we've covered in like, 3 months? since starting school. it looks like sth we'd cover in an entire year in rg. or maybe not.. but in any case, i'm not really looking forward to june hols. apart from the fact that we dont have to go sch.





i think i might need to sleep more and be more productive (in studying). but that would mean giving up on time for enjoyment and relaxation. it's so difficult to keep a balance between doing work and doing well academically, and having fun in life and not always studying. i dont want to go through 2 years of jc life always studying and doing very well for tests, but not having fun at all, and not doing anything else apart from studying. i really dont want that and i cant stand that. but yet, i dont want to do badly in jc, cos A levels are the most impt thing for now. think i'm starting to find that balance (a bit of a slanted balance perhaps, but that could be tolerated) but it feels so insecure.


pulau semakau 010509

knobbly sea starswimming crab (it's huge! but please dont think of sea food -.-)

Chek Jawa 020509
common sand star
mantis shrimp
gecko i think. aiya some lizard for sure. it was uh, interacting with another one higher up on the tree.


class camp 4-5 may





in times to come, perhaps we'll look back at these memories, and realised how much we've changed. how much we've grown. or even, how much we've drifted apart.

Sunday, May 10, 2009

kay the crazy week's over.

rsbs camp was fun and pretty slack, and class camp was quite fun (it was a major relief to be away from school and in the outdoors!) and really slack. so in general i conclude that jc camps are pretty slack. though of course, i didnt go for sports cca camps or council camps or wtv else.

shall spam photos another time, but class photos are alr up on fb. stupid bulk uploader got prob, had to use simple uploader instead.


and the week was really stressful and packed and :/ damn glad for the long weekend. though it's alr 2/3 over. econs test was wthh, think most ppl in my lt's gonna fail.






aaron's pres, juan and isaac vice pres! soff's bb capt! (super amused xD) jean hui's mt capt! si xuan's hh capt! zhuo yang's mr capt! marilyn's bw capt! (dont really know her though)


and most of the other ccas excos alr out. congrats to those who got posts(: and for those who didnt, dont take it too hard then.





haha honestly, i think last year, i wouldnt have thought i'd have made the choices i made and would be living the life i'm living.
kay but nvm, i alr made the choices, and i cant turn back time. live with it(:


meanwhile, hw and tests beckon. :/ i really think rj students dont have much of a life. most anw. 3 more weeks till june hols (when we'll have to study for CTs) ppl!




and i shall proceed to pose as another jc student tmr :P aching from sat's climb :/ nvr stretch properly.
pulau semakau, knobbly sea star! 6-armed
<2/3 of 10S03E

Friday, May 01, 2009

i remember at the end of last year, when we spoke of jc, we talked about change. we talked about how some people would change in jc, and how hopefully we wouldnt change.

but i guess change is inevitable, cos change we did; whether it was drastic or subtle, change in behaviour or change in thought.

and i remember how we said that, no, we do not and we will make sure we will not turn out like some people. or perhaps i imagined that.


you have changed. and a lot. from how i used to remember you. and i dont know, perhaps i'm just unreceptive to change. or maybe you havent, you're still the same inside. but certainly, on the outside you have changed. a change that i suppose, and hope, is good.





and though i think, in thought and in emotions and inside, i'm still the same, i wonder if i've changed on the outside? or perhaps i've changed the way i behave at certain settings.

i know i've certainly become a lot more academic-focussed, a lot more kan cheong about hw and grades and tests.

but at least, i think, i've managed to keep my relationships intact, and not completely abandoned/forgotten. or maybe it's just my insecurities..




in any case, all those that i asked, they all said that jc was not as fun as sec sch. and i think so too. jc seems like nothing but slogging with the ultimate aim of A levels and uni. i really wonder how do people not get burned out, when we already study so hard for tests that are not being counted into our grades. or maybe it's just me o.O









went to pulau semakau this morning! saw a file snake (the tail only though), a pygmy squid, a synaptic sea cucumber, an upside-down jelly fish, lots of hairy crabs and knobbly sea stars. 3 pretty big swimming crabs. and naturally, seagrasses (: sponges and corals too. simply awesome, i wish i could do this everyday. enjoy the peace and tranquility of being separate and away from crowded, urban Singapore. and really, makes you reflect and think about the bigger picture and meaning in life. shall post photos another time, along with Chek Jawa tmr, rsbs camp (if any) and class camp (if any) :D for now, let's just take some time to seriously reflect on our purpose in life, apart from getting As for A levels.

the sun's always there, only thing is if we can see it.



dad's birthday today. mom planned a surprise party, with all his old friends and everything. hope he's happy(: and it's Kelly's birthday too! haha i remember all the rubbish we used to do in primary school in our class. primary school was fun (: