In brief...

I'm a Nature-lover, aspiring conservationist, and wannabe traveller in search of outdoor adventure.
My interests vary from conservation to education to heritage to Nature (biodiversity & wildlife) to outdoor activities to life in general.
They occupy most of my waking moment.
Do read my blogs, follow me on Twitter (@jocelynesze) and friend me on Facebook (subject to my discretion). Visit my Nature blog, Nature Rambles, at http://natureramble.wordpress.com.

UPDATE 2 Apr 2017 - This site is no longer maintained, please visit jocelynesze.wordpress.com if you're interested in more recent writing.

Sunday, February 28, 2010

ytd was a great day spent at macritchie (morning) and tanjong rimau (afternoon). really enjoyed myself, walking around absorbing nature, talking bout stuff with like-minded people and doing things i love doing.

just makes me wish i could do it forever without having to worry about studies and work and everything else. which makes me wish that a levels were over.


but ah wells, reality strikes home, there's only 3 weeks to cts, and less for gp. feeling increasingly frustrated with my studies, with not understanding/knowing how to do math, with all the endless things to memorise and absorb and regurgitate.

really need to start sleeping earlier, staying awake in lessons, understanding what is being taught, writing out summaries for each topic for each subject, doing my tutorials and assignments and work harder.




photos from Tanjong Rimau (a rocky shore behind Rasa Sentosa Resort). not uploading Macritchie photos cos i think TR photos are nicer. they're all on facebook anw.

not sure what fish the striped white ones are, but i think there's a yellow eel blenny in the middle.copperbanded butterflyfish.blue lined flatworm.Halophila ovalis, seagrass.
polka-dotted jorunna. nudibranch/ sea slug.pistol/snapping shrimp, if i'm not wrong?hard coral. not sure what kind.brittle star! only sea star found i think.sea cucumber.some kind of flatworm.
red egg crab.
brown egg crab.
the other side of Sentosa. that not many visit, but for most of the time is the reason why i go to sentosa.

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

oh and happy birthday to two very special people!

juan (ytd) and soff (today) :D

hope they enjoyed their birthdays and our celebrations for them (:


happy 18th guys, thanks for being awesome friends and i really hope our friendship extends beyond jc! <3



printed enough photos of both of them that i'm too lazy to upload any.
been quite an interesting week already, though it's only tuesday.


since friday after srp, i've just been feeling quite... not stressed out over anything. which is not a bad thing, but not very good either. i need to start studying :/ been very complacent over my studies recently, not studying for class tests and all.



and finally went to climb today, after 3 whole weeks. and it's really nice to climb under non-stressful conditions, considering school and floorball and everything. really just relax and enjoy (: hopefully can still find time to climb, at least once a week. or perhaps a fortnight, if really cannot.



but what made my week interesting was several findings.
firstly, that rui ci bird-watches! it's a cool and awesome discovery and yay more friends to go out to nature with (:
and also that i have friends who keep very very interesting pets.





and yes, i suppose i should notice people more often, rather than staring straight ahead with my default expression, which apparently discourages people from talking to me. and initiate conversations, seeing as how i often rely on others initiating conversations.




we should really count our blessings. because we have been given so much more than others already.



and i know for one that i am very thankful for everything that i have been given, for every opportunity and every blessing. He has given me so much more than, i think, i really deserve.

Saturday, February 20, 2010

yesterday was a memorable day.

closed one chapter of my jc life, and another one too, kinda.

srp is over :D after the whole year of sacrificed holidays and poring over animals living under rocks and stressing and whining, i am done with it (: i felt so relieved and happy after oral defense, which didnt go too badly. i hope!

and i'm officially done with my h3 people xD while everyone else who does h3 still has to go for classes and exams and stuff like heh.


apologies to all who may have suffered while i stressed out over oral defense. i realise when i am stressed but dont really want to whine/cant whine, i just get very taciturn.


but i think i might miss st john's a bit, and well i really did learn quite a lot from it.





then stayed out with soff, shaina and resh till 10 at night (: it was impromptu and i think we need more of this in our lives. it was really good catching up properly (the one after take 5 didnt count, i wasnt there mentally) and just chatting and laughing and enjoying ourselves. didnt feel like going home. but those three are gonna be real busy all the way till june probably.




and again, my life will be bio-centred (: or perhaps, ecology/biodiversity centred.




perhaps if i had one wish, i'd just wish for a panacea to all the world's problems. overpopulation leading to poverty and starvation and disease breakouts, animal cruelty and environmental pollution and degradation due to man's limitless needs, corruption and lack of conscience and empathy and everything.



all the best to everyone who's gonna have a very busy period ahead, please take care of yourself (eat and sleep properly!) and i think most importantly, never regret the decisions you made.

Monday, February 15, 2010

the past few days have been pretty exciting, and yet quite boring too. i think i'm getting jaded by all the festivities, hardly find cny very exciting anymore.



thursday friday were very very long days, long but quite fun. spent most of them on sentosa.

didnt donate blood on thursday, but went down for an hour to help liang si. and i really quite admire those who did donate their blood. my parents dont donate blood and i dont know any relatives who do, so blood donation is somewhat foreign to me? those who donated say it doesnt hurt (cos of local anesthesia administered) but still, to have a huge needle stuck in your and your own blood being drawn out seems quite scary to me! but i resolve to donate my blood next time (:

in part, perhaps cos it's kinda cool to say that i donated my blood, and also more importantly cos it can really help to save lives(:



class chalet at costa sands sentosa at night. met up with shi min, lynn, liang si, hoong yan, tuck wai, michael, charlene, xian min and bryan for dinner at vivo before taking the monorail over (we had to pay $3!) when daniel joined us. spent most of the night watching the guys play ddr/entertaining others when i tried it. strangely enough, it occurred to me that it's the first time i know guys to be better at dancing than girls. by convention, girls dance more than guys right.. but i suppose the guys in my class... :P
the others were mostly playing cards/stoning and amanda chin, nad and sihui joined us later.

went out for a walk after most people tired out, sentosa is really nice and quiet and rather dark at night. could see more stars (than on mainland) and hear the cicadas and the leaves rustling in the wind and the waves crashing on the shore. room was crowded and really cold, some of us went to the poolside to sleep. or not sleep. after i woke up, went out for a walk again, this time to catch the sunrise.

sunrise at sentosa is really dismal and disappointing. went to the "southern most tip of continental asia" and climbed the stairs up the tower, hoping that i could get a good view of the sunrise. unfortunately, the horizon was blocked by not-too-distant foliage and well you really cant see the sun rising.


take 5 was... not exactly very very exciting or fun, but it was rather enjoyable i suppose. spent most of it with some of my classmates eating breakfast/stoning/sleeping. walked around the entire place getting free food and talking to people. but i think i prefered the place at night when it wasnt crowded and filled with people.


class learning journey was after, went to the merlion and the luge. was quite fun(: class camwhored quite a bit xD


went out with soff shaina and resh at vivo after(: and the highlight of my day was getting free ice cream from ben & jerry's :D :D tho i was super tired and zonked out by then. but yay it was really cool, hopefully can find time to go b&j with some people again before the offer ends xD and as usual being the childhood-deprived not-exactly kids that we are (18 is closer to adulthood than childhood D:) we paid a visit to toy'r'us (or however it's spelt). it's been such a long time since we last spent so much time together. and it's probably gonna be another long spell before we can get together again. :/ busy and conflicting schedules and stacks of schoolwork :/

crashed at 10pm after i got home and did the usual stuff. super early :D



went to macritchie the next morning and saw super cool stuff! various bugs and spiders, terrapins and turtles, fish and birds(: like owls! saw many things that i had never seen before, despite having been to macritchie quite a few times.

but it was also quite.. saddening? to think of how so much has changed since the times that i went there with odac. back then there werent so many students/people running the trails. in a sense it's quite good that people are going there and visiting the nature reserve? but yet they're not doing it for nature, as they run, i doubt they find the time nor energy to look around and observe their surroundings and admire nature and appreciate what they have. and people used to greet each other on the trail, i remember how the other trail users used to smile at us (odacians) and greet us with a good morning. yet now everyone just deadpans and stares straight ahead and focus on pushing themselves and running their fastest or whatever, and even push/shout at you to move out of their way. i dont suppose this is really progress.
and really, those who go there often, once a week or a few times a week to train. it's quite sad that all they take macritchie to be is a place to train. they dont see the things we (ecolit) saw during that few hours on saturday. they dont know how much this place holds, the awesome things that you see, if you just pause for a moment and observe/listen.



chinese new year is rather less hyped up than new year, dont you think? it's been quite nice, seeing relatives that you see once a year, having lots of food and stuff, but yeahh apart from that it's been rather... boring?


sunday's readings were about the beatitudes.
"Fortunate are you who are poor, the kingdom of God is yours.
Fortunate are you who are hungry, for you will be filled.
Fortunate are you who weep now, for you will laugh.
Fortunate are you when people hate you, when they reject you and insult you and number you among criminals, because of the Son of Man. Rejoice in that day and leap for joy, for a great reward is kept for you in heaven. Remember that is how the ancestors of this people treated the prophets.
But alas for you who have wealth, for you have been comforted now.
Alas for you who are full, for you will go hungry.
Alas for you who laugh now, for you will mourn and weep.
Alas for you when people speak well of you, for that is how the ancestors of these people treated the false prophets." - Luke 6:20-26

and it's rather confusing. i dont suppose it's meant to be taken literally.
as long as we use what we have (our gifts/talents, our wealth) to do good, to make other lives better and happier, and live our lives the way God would want us to live, that's what matters i guess. to help others in whatever way we can selflessly and sincerely.




in any case, it's nearly the end of our cny hols. hard to enjoy properly when the amount of hw you have to do hangs over you like a shadow, constantly at the back of your mind. squandered away most of my time sleeping/slacking/stoning. and feeling guilty about not doing work/studying.




and now my mind is only fixed on one thing. h3 srp oral defense. hope that everything will go well :/

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

i dont get why people keep saying life sucks. especially people of average socio-economic status, kinda thing?

for one, you choose your own life, dont you? you choose what you want to do with every bit of time you have, choose the activities. or at least to a certain extent, you have some choice.

and for another, it's not like the rest of the world doesn't have work to do, that everyone else is slacking while you're drowning in mountain-high piles of work. in fact, i think the rest of the world have more reason to complain then you do, especially people living in poor conditions?

so i really dont get why people keep saying life sucks (over every little thing), or fml. the most i'd ever say (and i do say it), is that school sucks. life doesnt suck. i am very blessed to be alive, and to have many things that i can do with my life(:





weird maybe, but when you say sentosa i think rocky shore and seagrass not siloso beach and uh volleyball? (:

Tuesday, February 09, 2010

hmm havent updated in a long time, not just because i've been busy, but also cos i dont quite know how to phrase my thoughts properly.

but wells, a lot of stuff has happened/been happening and i feel the urge to blog again.



orientation has ended (a week ago :/) and i'm actually quite glad it has ended, cos i didnt think i'd have the energy to last anymore, and missing 4 days of lessons is already bad enough :/ but it was a good experience, learnt loads over the past few months and made some friends, and my og is pretty awesome (: just hope they dont die out too soon D:


been having lots of bio stuff in my life again(: kinda renews my passion for... biodioversity/marine biology/environment/outdoors. the leafmonkey workshop last fri, ecolit on mon morning, chit-chat session with an environmental science graduate mon afternoon and various other stuff.
though it kinda... reinforces my... attitude? that school is very sian. cos i cant do so many things that i'd rather be doing. but nevertheless, i shall study hard and get good grades and after my a levels, i will do the things i want to do(:



nets for nets carnival on saturday was pretty interesting, spent time running around doing random jobs and errands and picking rubbish (a bit like highlights in a sense and seeing quite a few highlighters kinda reinforced that impression) but it was quite fun i guess. though i had to miss going to macritchie for it :/



but recently been thinking about environment, food crisis, poverty, inequity and all the icky stuff that's plaguing the world. it's just darned annoying that there are so many economic and political factors involved in solving these world problems. it's not like we cant really solve these problems; we can, just that people are more concerned over stuff that dont really matter (in my opinion). hai if only we could live in a world of peace, love and selflessness.





i suppose the only thing we can do to help, is little things that might not seem like much, but wells every little bit counts i guess.





and to end off with one of my favourite quotes,

Success
To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of childrenl
To earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, a garden patch or redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived.
This is to have succeeded.
- Ralph Waldo Emerson (though it's rather contentious)


and i guess this quote is one of the guiding principles in my life. if you want to know why i do the things i do.